The Last Page
by razmatazz3000
Summary: Christian's been missing for a while, and AJ tries to find out what happened. Little did he know of the secrets Christian has kept hidden. Christian Cage x AJ Styles. TNA slash.


**Disclaimer: **I don't own any of the characters I'm using. They totally belong to TNA and stuff.

**Author's Notes:  
**HOLY GOD I HAVEN'T WRITTEN ANYTHING IN LIKE 10 YEARS. Right, I'm exaggerating but whatever, y'know. Anyways, at least I came up with something new. Took me a long time to do it, but still. Okay, yeah. Anyways, this is set before the whole thing where Christian and his crew come in and save AJ. Which was totally hot BTW, just saying. As always, leave review kay? I love reviews.

* * *

**The Last Page**

"Is this the end for us?"

The question was accompanied by a soft waver to her voice. Unshed tears collected at her dark brown eyes, and she took a deep breath. Seeing as the man in front of her did not reply to her question, she took that as a good enough answer. This was the end.

Here Karen Angle was, in the men's locker room, close to tears. This was unlike her. However, ever since she and Kurt had separated, it was as if her composure left as well. She seemed to fade away with the days. Her normally nimble and exuberant manner was replaced by a gloomy and lethargic shadow of her former self.

AJ noticed that.

He saw the tears that came to her every few days. He knew what was happening. She was simply a woman. A woman with quite possibly the worst luck in the history of the world. He knew what was going on with her and Kurt; she hated him. But at the same time, however, Kurt was _everything _to her. It was as if she had devoted her very soul and livelihood to Kurt alone. And when they had parted ways, she was left empty. AJ had tried to fill that void, the one that Kurt left.

But it was of no use.

Truth be told, though, AJ hadn't tried much. Of course, he did try to console her, and she did seem to get better at one point, but he hadn't taken it to the next step. He didn't offer her the love she needed. He didn't give Karen his heart. His heart was with someone else.

It was funny, how they both had found company in each other while they were both having their own difficulties with their love lives. Karen probably had it worse, though. She was broken. She was frantic to find someone to keep her from being cold and alone. It was quite possible that she had developed a trivial infatuation over AJ along the way, but none of it was genuine. It was never meant to be. She didn't know what was bothering him, but AJ had his own demons too. He never quite opened up to her. Karen was the opposite; her desperation caused her to pour out her heart and soul to the closest person to her. At least, that was what she had figured out. The whole thing was just so confusing.

She had learned something during the course of the time though; misery really does love company.

"Karen… I'm sorry." AJ took a step closer to her. He placed both of his hands onto her stiff shoulders and gently squeezed. "But you and I both know that it's not meant to be."

She nodded hastily, and shrugged AJ's hands off. "I know, I know. I just… never thought that I'd have to face this moment."

"You know…" he started, awkwardly looking away. "I'll always be here if you need me. As a friend."

She managed to smirk at that. "Thanks."

A moment passed, before he asked again, "We're good?"

Only one thing was going through Karen's mind. It was time. She needed to move on. She needed to embrace the freedom that Kurt had involuntarily provided her with. "Yeah, we're good." She stepped forward, and embraced the man in a hug, comfortably wrapping her arms around him.

As soon as they stepped back from each other, he said, "You'll find someone, someday."

"You too." She nodded. "But I'm guessing you already did?"

A pause followed.

"It's complicated, I guess." The smile had instantly left his face upon Karen's reminder. He was in love with someone else, and no matter how hard he tried, falling out of love was impossible. He had never actually told her about it, though. "Wait, how did you…"

"I figured."

"Oh…"

She continued, "You were distant, AJ. So distant. I just knew something was up."

"It was that obvious, huh?" He chuckled slightly.

Karen didn't answer. Instead, she inquired, "You wanna talk about it?"

"No," he replied, shaking his head. She had far too much problems of her own. If he unloaded his baggage on top of hers, that would be too much for her to handle. He didn't want that. As much as they weren't a romantic fit, he did care about her. She was a wonderful person, and he knew that she would always be there for him. But the time was not right for her to know. "It's not important right now."

"Ah, okay."

Another pause followed.

"Well," she sighed. "I'll just… get my things."

"Right." AJ nodded.

AJ glanced around as Karen started picking up her belongings and putting them in her handbag. Nobody was inside the room. It was just the two of them. His eyes settled on a locker at the farther end of the room. The locker had been unattended for quite some time.

"Where is Christian anyways?" Karen asked, noticing where AJ was looking. "I haven't seen him in a while."

"Two weeks and seven days."

Yes, he was counting.

Because he missed him.

"Heh, you counted? That's funny, because-" Her sentence was immediately cut short. "Wait a minute. You counted. Why would you… oh, dear."

AJ looked away, looking bashful.

"You're in love with _him_, aren't you?" She whispered. "God, it all makes sense now."

He stayed quiet. It would be ridiculous if he tried to cover it all up now.

"AJ…" Karen swallowed. She didn't quite know what to say, so she said the first thing that popped in her head. "It's okay."

x

The high heels clicked as they made contact with the floor as Karen walked towards her car. Her talk with AJ had been comforting, even though it was the official end of their so-called relationship. The revelation had been surprising though. She would never have guessed that it would be Christian, of all people. Sure, he and AJ were close, but they never came off as more than brothers. Humans were mysterious creatures, she supposed.

This reminded her of her journey further on. Even if her road with AJ had ended, her own road continued a long way ahead. She would experience new things and see things in a different light. At times, it might get difficult - but she could handle it.

"Hey, Karen! Over here!"

She looked to her left. The voice had came from Kip James, who was sat atop his car. Beside him sat Robert Roode, a silent smirk on his arrogant face. She threw them a questioning look.

"Wanna come over for a… ride?" Kip grinned brazenly.

Karen looked him over. He was the type of person who couldn't care less about somebody after he had received what he wanted. The type of person who would tell you to shut up if he saw you crying. The type of person who cared for nothing more than himself, and quite possibly a title… or a gold medal.

Whatever he was, he reminded her of someone she'd rather forget.

She stared at him dead in the eyes. "No chance."

x

For once in his life, AJ Styles was being truly and utterly impulsive.

He was in Christian's house.

His _house_, for God's sake! As much as it shamed him to admit it, he still kept the key. Christian had given him the key during the times when the Coalition was still going strong. It wasn't just because of the tag team that prompted Christian to give it to him, though. Tomko didn't get a key. He only gave it to AJ.

It might've been out of love, but AJ was not sure.

They had moments. Fleeting glances backstage, lingering touches, they all contributed to the growing affection between them. Soon enough, they became something more. Behind the cocky façade, Christian was still a man. AJ had gotten the chance to see every side of that man. There was nothing to hate.

He just had to turn on him.

It was the biggest mistake of AJ's life, that elbow shot back in February. There had not been one single day that passed without him regretting it. He felt guilt like no other. He didn't even know why he did it in the first place. Maybe it was because he longed so much for something else, something new. He had always seeked for things that he couldn't have.

He sighed, quietly shutting the front door. Someone could have easily spotted him. Christian's friends from the WWE like Chris and Adam, perhaps? That would be hell to pay for AJ. He had virtually nothing as an excuse as to why he was even near the neighborhood in the first place, much less in Christian's house. The whole thing still seemed surreal. He was in Christian's house. He hoped that he was doing the right thing. After all, he was worried about Christian's whereabouts. Even Cornette and the management had creases in their foreheads after the third time the Canadian didn't show up to work. At first, they had assumed that he was simply taking some time for himself. He had a rough few weeks before that after all, with all the beatings he had been taking from AJ's ex-friends.

Turning on Christian was a mistake, but turning on Kurt was another thing entirely. It wasn't a mistake at all, because it had to be done. The man was a power-crazy lunatic. AJ was sure that everybody in the company would vouch for that. He had no idea how Karen managed to stand by him through the years before he came to TNA.

Walking up the stairs, he scolded himself for delving too deep into his thoughts, considering where he was. He just needed to find out what happened to Christian, and then he would be fine. The bedroom appeared to be a good focus point, and so he went there first. The way he knew the house like the back of his hand was rather pathetic, at least to him. It was just that he had been here so many times. He cursed himself for forgetting to cherish every single moment of it.

As soon as he walked inside the other man's room, an air of familiarity seemed to greet him. It did not appear as though Christian did much with the room, as it looked identical.

It was as if AJ never left.

He wanted to dwell on that fantasy for longer, but he stopped himself. Something in the bedside table caught his eye. It called out upon him with its vibrant color and appeal. Upon closer inspection, he saw that it was a red notebook. Leather-clad and compact, it was so Christian that it hurt.

"A diary?" AJ picked it up, confused. He had never seen the book around before. Plus, Christian had never mentioned anything about him writing in a journal or even owning one.

AJ bit his lip. He was curious. Should he read it? After all, it might explain the older man's disappearance. But still, it bordered on criminal behavior…

Shrugging, AJ flipped the book open. He filed through most of the entries. They were all regular daily things that didn't interest to him. What did interest him, though, was the last entry. Compared to the others, which were only a few lines long, this entry was worth a few pages. The date was around 3 weeks back, so AJ figured that it might have something to do with him being missing. Taking a few seconds to admire the neat handwriting, he began reading.

_May 6th_

_I don't know what to do anymore._

_The worse part is that nobody knows what I'm going through. I know I have to tell somebody, but who? I don't want to go to Terry again, he has helped me so much through all of this that going to him yet another time would be humiliating. I guess I shouldn't talk, though. After all, beggars can't be choosers. But still. He has been so understanding. I don't want to be a bigger burden than I already am. I suppose I could go to church and dump it all in a confession, but that won't help much. I mean sure, it would help because somebody is listening, but it still won't solve anything. I need solutions, answers, advice. What the hell am I supposed to do?_

_It all started from one thing. The root of my problems began with him. God, he is so beautiful. I can't believe I have never properly noticed it until after he was gone. Now I'm just some fucking schoolgirl with a crush. I should've appreciated him, but instead I treated him like trash most of the time. The only times I didn't are the times when we were in bed. I'm disgusting. No wonder he left me for someone better._

_I don't hate her at all. She deserves him, so much more than I do. They deserve each other. She's beautiful, he's beautiful. Yeah, the perfect couple. But it still hurts. Seeing him so happy and knowing that it's because he left me? Yeah, it fucking hurts. Even if I got another chance, I still won't be able to make him half as happy. I'm a bad person. I do bad things. I feel so shitty right now, but it's true. I can't seem to figure out why I do it when I know that it's hurting the people I love. I love him. I have loved him from the moment I set my eyes on that man. Dear God, I'm sounding like a cheesy romance novel right now but I don't care. He is the most amazing person I have ever encountered. But I guess that he gets these confessions of love every other day of the week, huh? I might be stroking my ego here a little bit, but I guess I'm different. I actually got my chance with him. And I blew it all the hell away. This is just so uplifting, I know._

_It's all getting so complicated. I never knew that it would get this bad. I feel like some kind of a desperate loner, not knowing what's gonna come next. It's not even funny. Some days, I'm surprised that I can even get out of the damn bed. My eyes feel heavy all the time. It's a sign. Maybe life's not meant for me. That's why I'm leaving. I don't_

AJ frantically flicked to the next page, and then the next, but the rest of the book was empty. His face was pale. Christian wouldn't attempt to kill himself… would he? He willed himself to calm down. This couldn't possibly mean what he thought it meant. He seemed perfectly fine the last few times AJ saw him.

He quickly went to check the bedside drawer, but it was locked. AJ gulped. He was worried beyond belief. The fact that this was written only shortly before Christian's disappearance didn't help much either.

His heart was beating faster now at the thought of that. Christian's last entry nearly brought him to tears.

And he still loved AJ.

That was the greatest news that AJ had heard all month.

He couldn't stay to celebrate, though. Christian was still missing. He knew from Cornette's complaints in the break room that Christian wasn't answering his cellphone. So where else should he look?

"What are you doing here?"

Guess there was no need to look after all.

AJ jumped at the sudden sound of the voice. Immediately, he turned around. He couldn't manage to hide his gasp. It was Christian. Though the tone in his voice was demanding, his facial expression showed none of that. In fact, there was almost something almost warm in his eyes, as if he was gratified. For some reason, that made AJ tense up even more.

The blonde carefully glanced around, before noticing the small red notebook AJ held in his shivering hand. His eyes widened.

"Christian, I… I can explain." AJ swallowed. That was a bad move on his part. What was there to be explained? There simply was no sensible excuse as to why he was in Christian's room, prying around and setting his hands on the man's personal belongings. Not for the first time in his life, AJ cursed his curiosity. "Um…"

"AJ," he slowly called. Taking a step closer, he repeated, "What are you doing here?"

Averting his eyes, AJ sheepishly muttered, "I sneaked in. Thought you weren't coming back until... you know, later."

"That wasn't my question."

"I know, but… I have no idea why I'm here. It's just that you've been gone for a long time, and I wanted to know why. So I… I came here." He exhaled. His eyes still did not leave the floor. He was afraid. Afraid to see what Christian's reaction would be. Afraid to show Christian that he still cared.

"And you found that," Christian added for him, gesturing to the notebook. He tried to make his question sound as offhand as possible, but his distress showed through. "You… you read that?"

AJ set his eyes on the notebook, before realizing what must be going through in the older man's head. "No, it's not like that, Christian… I won't tell anyone."

Christian seemed to find this amusing, as he let out a soft chuckle. "Yeah, right. I bet you're just dying to let people know how much of a wimp I really am. Well, go ahead. I don't fucking care."

At the wrath in Christian's voice, AJ pursed his lips. He hadn't heard Christian speak like that before. AJ's discovery of the book must've triggered something.

Or, it could be that AJ had never stuck around long enough to truly see every side of Christian.

There was that guilty feeling again.

Shaking his head to get rid of the cluttering thoughts, AJ focused on other things. "Christian… where's the rest of the last entry?"

"What?"

"This." AJ held the book up. "Your last entry was in a few weeks ago."

Christian was silent.

"Christian," he slowly spoke. "What did you do after you wrote this?"

"I didn't do anything." The taller man clasped a hand over his face, closing his eyes.

"What?" AJ whispered, eyes wide. A few seconds passed, before he questioned, "So where were you?"

Hands still held over his face, the blonde calmly replied, "On a trip."

"Where?" Upon receiving no reply within the next few seconds, AJ demanded again, "Christian, where the hell were you these past few weeks?"

The Canadian reached into his pocket, and AJ's answer came in the form of a ring of keys, flying right by the side of his face, nearly hitting him. Instinctively, AJ's eyes shut.

"Does that answer your fucking question?"

As soon as he reopened his eyes, Christian had turned around and was now walking down the stairs. AJ picked up the keys that the blonde threw and examined it.

The drawer?

He quickly went and shoved it in. They _were_ the keys to the drawer. He opened them cautiously, unsure of what he was about to find. Taking a deep breath, he looked in.

Bottles of antidepressants. Lots and lots of them.

And they were all empty.

"Oh, God." AJ breathed. He never would have thought that their breakup would cause this to Christian. Sure, it did take a toll on AJ as well, but it was nothing that he couldn't bounce back from. But Christian?

Christian was a mess. A mess that AJ was more than willing to fix.

He went after Christian, running down the stairs. After a few glances around, he finally spotted the other man, slumped down in a corner of his living room. AJ froze. What was he supposed to say? He had been dreaming of a world where Christian forgave him for everything, but from the looks of Christian now, it appears as though his expectations differed from reality. He had always thought that Christian kept it together after AJ betrayed him. After all, he looked fine on the outside.

But this, the Christian that had his head down? This was nothing like the Christian he saw around.

"Christian?" He gently called out, nearing him. "Are you… alright?"

He did not receive a fast reply. Christian took a few moments to ponder the question before finally answering, "No, AJ. No, I am not."

The brunette kneeled down in front of Christian so that they were eye level with each other. "You know," he started, grasping the older man's knee. "We all feel down sometimes."

He was about to say something, but AJ stopped him by interrupting and saying, "But we can all get back up if we fall down. Be it on our own or with some help from other people, we'll get up."

"Are you a psychologist now?" Christian's smirk was hidden by his slouching position.

AJ chuckled, but then the smile faded. "Christian."

"Mmhm?"

He sighed. Christian wasn't opening up to him. He still had a tight shell around him that masked his emotions. AJ wanted to get rid of that. But how?

He did the only thing he could think of, and pulled him in for a tight hug.

"I just want you to know," he whispered, softly pressing Christian's face against his shoulder. "That I'm here for you."

Not more than a few seconds afterwards, the older man returned the embrace, wrapping his arms around AJ's body. His shoulder felt damp and soon enough, Christian's body shook with sobs that pulled at AJ's heartstrings. He knew that Christian needed to let it out, but it still hurt to see him in so much pain.

After a few minutes, AJ whispered, face slightly blushing, "I… read the journal."

"I know you did." Christian's voice was calmer than AJ expected.

"Look, Christian," Pulling away, AJ kept his hands on Christian's shoulders. "I love you too."

With that said, he brought the blonde's face in, delicately pressing their lips together. It was a simple enough contact, but it lit a fire deep inside AJ. This was exactly what he wanted.

"AJ…"

"Shh, don't speak. We don't need words now." AJ tenderly cradled the side of Christian's face, wiping away the traces of tears from before. He smiled slightly, before wrapping his arms around the other man again.

Christian nodded, accepting the touch. He wasn't properly better yet, but he was getting there. And he knew that AJ would be around to catch him if he fell backwards again. Things were looking up. It would take time, but they would get there eventually.

And to think that an emotion-driven journal entry brought them back together.

He didn't even remember where he kept the last page, but he wasn't missing it at all.

**-end.-**


End file.
